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am i more interesting on paper than i am in voice?
do i look better in pictures than i do through a lens?
every three steps up is followed by a fall down the stairs.
i am sorry i didnt want to hold your hand today. i didnt want anyone touching me.
i missed going on hikes and having photoshoots. i have a photoshoot planned for friday and two more this weekend. i like it when the models are excited. they are so happy but when im shooting they know how to channel what i ask. i like models who are ecstatic but listen to me. sometimes there is a fleeting moment that i dont direct. those are the best. those are the pictures i use. i just know that sometimes i have to ask things of them to make them comfortable first. i like models who think. you're allowed to have ideas. when im shooting digital our ideas are endless. im excited. my model is excited. the bedroom sounds exactly like the one i created in my head.

sex sex sex sex i need to schedule the sex-less shoots. i told katie that im turning in a naked picture but i cant wait to see those faces. katie wont mind. someone will squirm. i want to see them when they squirm.

i wonder if they've had sex yet.